Heaven Help Me!

I had Kevin get me a few copies of the papers that Branden needed to sign. I didn't want ANY excuse from him in regards to loosing them or something stupid like that. I emailed him and let him know that we needed to meet, somewhere private, within the next couple days. He let me know he'd be willing to meet with me that night. He had a lot of things he wanted to say to me in person. My first thought was well this should be good. My next thought was, better take "back up" with me.

I emailed Branden back and let him know I'd meet him that night at 7. I called in a favor from a friend (who also happened to be a trained MMA fighter... like I said "back up") who was supportive of me placing and supportive of the fact that Branden needed it handed to him.

I had never allowed Branden to see me pregnant, my plan was to actually NEVER let him see me pregnant (I didn't want him to know I was HOT pregnant... haha) but at this point I didn't exactly have an option. So I did my best to look as good as I could. My friend told me after the fact that Branden's mouth about hit the floor when he saw me. I immediately said... That's right he did a lot of wrong things to one HOT momma! I'll never forget the feelings of complete and utter worry that I had the whole time I got ready. I was worried that no matter what was said or done he wouldn't sign. I was worried that he'd convince me he loved me or something stupid and I'd change my mind. I was worried that I would say something stupid and let him know who the adoptive couple were (I didn't feel he deserved to know that). I was worried that I'd let him know I was having a girl. I was most of all worried that going and seeing him would make me question the choices that I had made.

We pulled up to his apartment, same one as before, and my heart sunk slightly. Had I known so many months ago pulling up to the same place that my life would take such a dramatic turn would I have still walked through that door? Had I known how he'd treat me would I still have walked through that door? And then the thought hit me.... This isn't part of your plan Katelyn, it's part of God's plan. They need your baby and this was a way for her to get here. I knew then that I would do whatever I needed to in order for him to sign the papers.

He opened the door and a whole new flood of emotions hit me... Hatred, anger, disgust, and every other negative emotion you could think of. I knew nothing he could say would change my mind. He didn't deserve to know anything about my child. He didn't deserve to ever see my child. The only thing he deserved were to be 6 feet under for the things he'd put me through.

The conversation goes as follows.... (My friend's name is Tim: he'll be T, Branden will be B, and I'll be K)

B: I have some things I need to get off my chest
T: I don't think she really cares to hear what you have to say
K: Nope I don't
B: Well I don't care if you want to hear it I'm going to say it anyway.
K: Actually you're not. The only reason I'm here is for you to sign the papers and get out of my life.
B: I'm not going to sign those papers
T: Wanna Bet?
K: At this point Branden you don't have a choice. You either sign these papers or you will no longer be a member of the Air Force. I went over your head, you have two choices. You either sign these or you'll be dishonorably discharged tomorrow.
B: You can't do that.
K: Oh yes I can. And I will. Try me. I will do anything and everything to keep this child from you and from your CRAZY family.
B: My family isn't crazy they are just concerned.
K: No they are crazy. Someone who is concerned doesn't say the things that you and your family have said to me. A person that is concerned doesn't attempt to berate a person like your own mother and grandfather attempted to do.
B: I had nothing to do with that. That was something they chose to do.
K: That's fine. Now you can choose to sign these papers.
B: I don't want to.
K: Guess what... I don't want to be pregnant and I am. I don't want to be here but I am. I don't want to hate you but I do. There are a lot of things because of you that I don't want. I don't exactly have a choice.
B: Don't they have to be signed in front of a notary?
K: I have a friend who is a notary sitting in the car. (I had pulled in another favor from a friend. I worked at a Car Dealership so it wasn't hard to find someone willing to help me out.)
T: I'll stay here while you go get her Kate.
B: You don't need to baby sit me.
T: I'm not baby sitting you. I'm making sure your dumb self doesn't call anyone.
B: Whatever

I went and got my friend.

B: I don't want to do this. I feel like you're forcing me to do this.
K: The only thing I'm forcing you to do is make your own choice now to sign these papers.
B: Whatever
T: Sign there, there and there.

After he signed (2 copies) I walked to the door and said... "If you ever try to see my child, contact the adoptive couple, or call me again you'll never live another day."

I got in the car and started crying tears of joy. Everything I thought that would stop my plan from happening had just disappeared. I could really do this. I was going to be able to give my baby everything in life without any risk or chance of things going wrong. In a matter of 10 minutes my life had gone from complex to simple. I would be able to follow through with everything that I wanted for my child. What a relief. I called Kevin and let him know that Branden had signed and I'd bring the papers in as soon as I could. My next call was to Lori and Barton.

K: Branden signed!
L: HOW?!
K: He knew he didn't have any other choices.
L: Seriously?
K: Ya. We don't have to worry about the adoption being stopped now. This baby is yours!

I don't know who was more relieved me or Lori. My life would soon however take a turn that I wasn't ready for.